This weekend, I attended a bosi ceremony - something they've been doing in this part of the world for thousands of years. You call one for any momentous occasion in life: before you go on a long trip, before a wedding or your first baby, or even when you're sick.
it's supposed to give the person good luck. they believe it re-arranges the 34 spiritual pressure points in your body.
it was for my friend's mom
we take a songthaew (a pickup truck with its bed converted into a taxi/bus) to the outskirts of the city. the ride is hot + humid + dusty. as soon as we arrive, the host family has cold plastic cups of soda + ice ready for us. the ice delivery man comes by with a 50lb sack of ice + fills a giant blue cooler. ice is an extravagance here as electricity is expensive, refrigeraters are tiny + ice-makers are non-existent. they also pass around shish-kebab appetizers, chunks of beef + tomatoes + onions + spicy green peppers
somebody brings out this christmas-tree-looking tower made w/ bunches of white string. + yellow flowers + money stuck in there. they also bring out a roasted chicken, and bottles of clear rice wine. one of the older men start to chant something I can't understand, some mantra not in the local language. @ one point, a lady throws a bunch of raw rice over the "christmas tree." it's a mixture of solemn + jovial, their hands clasped in revence but also laughing + smiling + making jokes. like a cross between a goodbye party + thanksgiving dinner
the ceremony is happening on the sprawling outdoor porch, and we're sitting outside of the main circle. Leaning against the wall, observing politely. @ the end, they start pulling the strings out of the tree + tying them onto each others' wrists - 7 strings on each wrist, held together with 3 knots.
my friend, who isn't directly participating in this ceremony for personal reasons, comes around w/ some of the white string. He offers me one. what does it mean, I ask? it's to wish the person good luck, he answers.
I wonder what I should do. I came here to pay respects to his mom, who's very old. I want to let them know that I accept them for who they are.
I take the string. it's ordinary white string. I look @ my other friends who came along - they're varying degrees of confused + uncomfortable. some politely decline, some take the string + hold onto it. I decide, I'm going to tie it onto my wrist.
Later on I find out, you're supposed to leave it on for @ least 3 days or it's bad luck. Oops.
They're about to break out w/ all the food, but we have to leave. They ask us to stay but kha thod, baw dai - sorry, we can't. We have another appointment.
I fully expect them to continue with the ceremony and ignore us, but all 30 or so people stop what they're doing, and watch us as we leave.
Who cares about these American "falang" tourist outsiders who stumble over + butcher their language. Who are rudely interrupting their ceremony + leaving early. I wonder how I'd react if they were to crash my birthday party or Christmas dinner, especially if they could barely speak English, + then abruptly left.
I wonder if I did the right thing by tying on that string
maybe that was going too far, in identifying with them
after all, I'm not them
I keep looking @ my string, hoping they notice that I'm accepting them. I don't think they really notice the string
I still can't forget their eyes as they watched us leave: quizzical, curious, accepting. I wonder what they saw in mine.
